Still Waiting

6 days to go and I'm finally feeling really ready to have this baby. All of the things on my "To Do" list are done, I've got nothin planned on my schedule, and my body is starting to feel tired and heavy. Maddie came a week early, and I'm really hoping he decides to come before the due date too.

Until then, I'll keep trying all my tricks to go into labor, napping in the middle of the day, going to bed at 9pm, and giving Maddie plenty of love and attention with the rest of my time!

Life As We Know It

Today I'm 37 weeks. It's crazy to me that our little guy will be here so soon. I've been having so much fun with my Maddie lately, and trying to savor every last minute with her because I know my time and attention is about to be dominated by her little brother. I just crack up at the funny little things she says and does all day long. I know she'll handle all the changes like a champ because she's such a sweetheart (95% of the time)...probably better than I will. I truly believe moms when they say their love instantly and infinitely expands with each child, but it's hard not to feel a tiny bit of sadness that Maddie won't have me all to herself anymore. But I'm so looking forward to meeting my son. I feel ready and up for the hard work that is labor and delivery because I know the elation that comes with holding that baby skin to skin for the first time. I remember the feeling that came into our home when we first brought Maddie home so fresh from heaven, and I can't wait for that. I do hope he waits a couple weeks to make his debut because I've got a list a mile long of things I still need to do! And sleep is on the top of that list so good night!

BiNkY fAiRy

Yesterday Maddison got a very special visit from the Binky Fairy.

She'd been waiting for her all week, but due to nonstop rain for a week (yuck), she arrived a little late. Fairies can't fly in the rain. Haven't you seen Tinkerbell?

She left a bucket with a letter that told Maddie if she gathered up all her binkies and gave them to the fairy, she'd give them to all the little babies that needed them. In return, she'd get a special big girl gift.

I wasn't sure if she really understood this meant giving up her most precious (nasty) binkies for good, but she seemed pretty excited about it, so we went with it.

Who knew how long this sweet smile would last, especially come bed time.

But the excitement only grew while waiting for the thank you gift.

It could barely be contained.

Until finally the doorbell rang and this little beauty appeared. (Notice the pixie dust?)

So a whole 6 feet of bubble tape was consumed...
And lip gloss was applied generously...

And after a few hours of crying late into the night and trying to be brave, our big girl finally fell asleep without her binky for the first time, like, ever.

I was so proud of her but felt her pain too. I mean, that binky made my life a heck of alot easier. And my baby has to go through hard things to grow up. So mommy didn't go without shedding a few tears last night too. Which doesn't say anything because I'm crying over just about everything these days. But as I type this, I hear the little stinker playing in her room when I put her down an hour and a half ago. Ugh. Let's hope I don't cave. It was now or never, right?

Entitlements and the American Dream

Today I am feeling worked up. I try to only let this happen a couple times a week, but today while walking on the treadmill at the gym, being forced to watch CNN, (the only channel besides ESPN they play there), I found myself feeling more and more, well, worked up. That, along with my ever-growing body that only allows me to walk at a 4.5 max without cramping up, started to really weigh me down.

So, as I thought about the uncertain state of the world, the unrest in the Middle East, the same unrest being brought to our country by the union bosses and socialist organizations, the astronomical national debt, the great divide politically, the biased media, the moral decay of society, (I could go on and on), I began to feel extremely powerless.

For example, the national debt is over 14 trillion dollars and threatens to end all that America ever was. If you read about the founders, you find that they valued thrift and knew that being in debt to other countries potentially made you slaves to them. The "American Dream," according to them as found in the Declaration of Independence was essentially "Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness." The idea that we would be given freedom to work hard and reap the rewards of that work. Not to mention create the jobs that provide the money to fund everything else. So when I read about Van Jones' version and use of the "American Dream" to rally the people against those who are only trying to save the country and states from bankrupcy, I was floored. They claim the American Dream is "about fairness and equal opportunity." To them it's all about "Social Justice, Environmemtal Justice, Economic Justice."

Really? When did the founders ever say that everyone had the right to a job, even if they sucked at it, or that we shouldn't use the resources we have (oil) because we don't want to give the earth a booboo? Or that we should continue to print and spend money like it's water and dig ourselves deeper and deeper into a hole. Yikes. I'm sorry, but I'm pretty sure most people don't believe the American Dream leads to Socialism.

Any resemblence?

So, walking along on the treadmill this morning, I decided to start thinking about the things I do have power over...

-I can work hard, be fiscally responsible, save, live within my means, and finish paying off our debts.

-I can educate myself and stand up for what I believe to be true. I can have confidence and voice my opinions.

-I can teach my children correct principles, accurate history, morality, and how to have lasting happiness.

-I can choose to be happy and have faith instead of fear, and hope that the freedoms I enjoy will still be intact for my kids.

-I can pray for the leaders of our country and world and follow the counsel of a prophet who speaks for a loving Father in Heaven.

-I can see the good in others, no matter what they believe, treat everyone with respect, and agree to disagree.

-I can be charitable, serve others and pay my tithing.

-I can vote.

-I can make my home a refuge from the storm.

So even though my body felt weak and my sciatica was killing me, I limped out of the gym feeling like a powerful mama :)!

Busy is Better

(No matter what state I'm in.) I don't know if I was feeling guilty from doing next to nothing the day before, or if I had energy from resting, probably both, but Friday was quite the productive day. Maddie and I got up and did yoga together and then went for a bike ride to the store. (I'm sure I looked like the biggest dork with my 8 month pregnant belly and helmet, pulling a bike trailer, but oh well). I bought some new running shoes, we stopped at the park on the way home, and by the time we got home, the babe was ready for a nap. She's had a nasty cough the past couple days and can't get enough of her "nice and cozy" big girl bed. I, on the other hand, decided to be the Little Red Hen.

A few months ago I bought a bunch of food storage, but didn't know the least bit about how to use it. So Friday I decided I'd better learn. Hesitantly, I opened a can of hard red wheat, stuck it in my Blendtec, and yes people, I ground my own wheat into flour. Only a couple hours later I ended up with these!

Can you tell I'm pretty proud of myself? They turned out kinda heavy because they are whole wheat, but they taste good. I'm gonna have to experiment with different recipes, but it's nice to know I can feed my family.

So later that day I was putting my boots on and Maddie comes in and asks if I'm going to work. I said no, I'm going to a movie with daddy. She gets so excited and tells me she's going to get her shoes and jacket. I honestly felt so bad telling her we were going on a date and she was staying with a babysitter. She had a meltdown. (Which was so me any time my parents left me with a babysitter or my older brothers, except I was always terrified that a robber was gonna come.) For a moment I thought about dropping our plans and taking her to a kid movie, but I got over it. JD and I got to have a yummy dinner just the two of us, and see The Adjustment Bureau. I realized that pretty soon we're gonna have another little appendage that will be even harder to leave, so I'd better enjoy the next few weeks!

estoy aburrida.

Translation: I'm bored.

(But it's more like I'm boring.)

I'm sitting here at my computer trying to think of something to blog about, cuz I know I've been a slacker, but all I can think about is all the things I should be doing, but instead I'm choosing to sit here and stare at the computer. It's weird to be so unmotivated, and I kinda drive myself crazy over it. For example, here's my list of to do's that I probably won't do:

Make dinner

Clean my bathrooms

Exercise

Fold the laundry

Pay the bills

Make the bed

Learn Spanish

Read my photography book

etc.

My poor hubby will get home and I'll probably ask him to give me a massage and take care of Maddie. I really do love that I get to carry a life inside me, and I'm getting so excited to meet this little guy, but it will be nice to not be pregnant and feel like me again. Until then I guess I should try to embrace my laziness and learn how to relax.

This little one, on the other hand is full of energy! I'm sorry to say, but I think she's the cutest. I just can't get enough of her these days. There's nothing I love more than catching her pretend playing in her room or watching her sing along to music in my rear view mirror. Every day she tells me that she wants to go to Disneyland. It's gonna be hard to stick around here the next couple months.

She's made the transition to her big girl bed and loves it. I'll post pictures of her new room and the baby's nursery as soon as they're done. Oh and we still aren't set on a name for our boy. Any suggestions?

TWO

Last week our sweet Maddie turned two. I can't even begin to express the joy this little one has brought us. I love being a mom, and I especially love be her mommy. I wanted to do a mini photo shoot with her in a cute outfit, but like most days, she got her way and picked out her own "beautiful dress." I actually love them because they say so much about her personality.

Maddie is a girly girl. She loves to wear dresses and jewelery, and always has to have her lip gloss. She's always in the bathroom bugging me for makeup when I get ready in the morning (or afternoon :), and tells me to wear a dress and high heels when I ask what I should wear. She loves the Disney princesses, and loves to sing and shake her booty. She's always pretending with her baby dolls, and has to feel her baby brother kick every morning when she climbs in bed with us.

She is Little Miss Independent, and has to do everything all by herself. She is so strong willed, and so strong physically that she won't be forced to do anything. I'm learning great patience. But luckily she is good through and through, so she eventually comes around. She is constantly talking (with the cutest lisp), and I'm always amazed by what she retains. Like the other day she told JD, "Be careful. Those are my special special pencils I got for my birthday." And everything is either a "big big one" or a "tiny baby one."

She loves doing yoga with me and wrestling with her daddy. I don't know what she likes to do more than color, swing, go to Disneyland, and swim in the jacuzzi. I think her favorite foods right now are Frosted Mini Wheats, string cheese, smoothies, and suckers. Her kisses and smiles melt my heart, and when she says "I love you mommy" I pretty much can't even handle it. There are some perks to having your kids get older, but sometimes I wish she could stay this age forever.

So there you have it. Everything you could ever want to know about Maddison White. I'm so grateful for the past two years I've gotten to hang out with this girl. I think she's pretty awesome, but I'm biased.

Christmas

Well, it's February, and I'm just now getting to my Christmas post. I swear, the days seem to be flying by, and I'm moving in slow motion. What's my deal? Anyways, we had too much fun to not share some pictures. Here's Maddie ready for a nap after church in front our our little tree.

We spent Christmas Eve and morning with my family, and had Christmas dinner with JD's. All of my siblings and our spouses got to stay in YL for a whole week, so we had a blast. Here we are in our new jammies.

Maddie and Briggsie both just turned two. They were so cute together.

The four grandkids looking sleepy on Christmas morning.

Maddie's big present that Santa's elves stayed up very late assembling. It's going to be perfect in her new big girl room!

Twins! They loved shakin it in these cute petti's.

The guys watched the kids while the girls went and saw a movie. (We saw 127 Hours. Definitely NOT a chick flick, but still got me crying at the end. I must be pregnant!)

Took the kids to Pretent City.

Bryce and Sarah organized a So You Think You Can Dance competition with a trophy and all for the winner. It was seriously hilarious, and will be a tradition for sure. Baliwood took an easy first place, and surprisingly our Hip Hop routine took second. I love my family :).

We also got to go to Stephanie Harn's beautiful wedding reception. I really love parties. Alot.

So, there you have it...our holiday recap.

Last but not least, a family photo with everyone looking!

Two Special Occasions, One Dress

Finding a formal dress is hard enough as it is, but doing it while pregnant makes it that much harder! So once I found one, I stuck with it.

The beginning of December brought my friend Erika's San Francisco wedding. I was so excited to see all my high school girlfriends and spend some time with the hubs without the little one, who spent the weekend (not missing us) with her cousins in Sac. We had so much fun together, as always, and even got to hang out all day in SF and go to Alcatraz on Sunday. Eri was a beautiful, glowing bride, and I loved getting to see another one of my friends marry a great man.

Later in the month was JD's work Christmas party. We got to stay at the Montage in Laguna Beach and hang out with friends for a couple days (kid-less again, thanks to the grandparents). We were spoiled for sure!

Love these girls! Can't wait til next time.

So, all in all, Christmas started early for me this year!

Thanksgiving

This year we spent Thanksgiving with the Whites. As always, we got our fill of good food and great company, and left remembering why we had so much reason to give thanks! We also got some really cute family pictures, which for some reason won't upload! Bummer.

The girls at the Cima's.

The kiddos taking a break from their dance party.

(This one was actually at Christmas when Mary went through the temple.)